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what do u think about marriage?

is it normal if a person worries thinking about getting married?

is it a must to worry about it?

those things keep spinning on my mind actually

because as soon i will entering twenty four, plus one more thing i keep thinking until now is, i can't find the right person for me

it's not easy as abc tadaaaa he's infront of u NO!NO!NO!

we im search not only a life partner, im searching a best friend, a crime partner, a leader, a mentor, just not for my self, for my our future children off course

the person whom i will share the bed with HAHAHA

the part that hurt me the most is when mom start talking about marriage in the kitchen

while im helping her doing the cooking, she said

"im getting older day by day, im will not be here to take care of you forever"

"you can go and get married now if u want"

gosh im crying inside like hell

WHAT IF I PUT OFF TOO LONG AND MY PARENTS ARENT ALIVE TO EVEN ATTEND MY WEDDING?

oh no

insyaAllah i not gonna happen

im thinking of what if i found a guy, the perfect one for me

i like him, he like me too and YES I DO happen?
would you still love me when im no longer young and beautiful?

what if the man i feel is the love of my life, but somehow we both fall out of love with each other, have a messy divorce, and end up to guarded and too hurt ever?

we get married and what if one of us end up having affair because im not sexy enough to hold his attention span for a lifetime?

what if one day my husband tragically dies in a car accident and i spend the rest of my life pining after him?

what if i get married and bear four children, only to have my husband decide hates me and the children and leave me all by my self?

what if we decide to have a children and he decide/force me to be a stay-at-home-mother? i want to go out working too!!

what if my mental illness spirals out of control and my husband leave me?if he not leave me, he has to financially and emotionally take care of me for the rest of his lives? but deep down he regret ever even dating me and dies bitter and resentful?

what if he decide he doesn't want children?and at the old age we crying and regret of our choice?

what if my husband loses his job and i need to carry the financial weight of the relationship and i fail and we can't makes ends meet?

im worried the most of this matter because things keep happened in front of me
its like a normal things now days
changing a life partner as changing clothes

i really hope that one day if i get married, all those things that I've been worried about didn't gonna happen

i pray to ALLAH s.w.t everyday that HE could make everything easier for me 

may us be bless and have a wonderful blessful family insyaAllah